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Nordic Fiction with a hint of Noir and Romance

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Female friendships

March 23, 2009 by Helena Halme Leave a Comment

If you read any chick-lit or other type of fiction on the subject, or watch any number of more or less sickening TV programmes about a group of female friends, you are led to believe female friendships are the most wonderful to be held.

I loved SATC, and as witnessed by long suffering partner, will even sit in front of the UK attempt at the successful series, The Mistresses. The women in the programme have affairs with good-looking men while enjoying high living standards and good jobs which require very little effort and time. These women also take motherhood in their stride while the men come and go. The important relationships in their lives are with their female friends who are supportive and loving (unlike the men).

While I’ve had and have several good and loving female friends I’ve also known many awful, vindictive, controlling, jealous and bitter women who have called themselves my friends. The latter group has been by far the most destructive. By far more destructive than any men I’ve known.

True, if the world was populated by wonderful, kind and loving people it would be a pretty dull place and I would have nothing to write about.

I’m a feminist and believe women are more complicated which makes female relationships sometimes crash and burn in a spectacular fashion. When men fall out they just leave each other in peace. When women do, they go to a war or words. So why, when it’s so difficult for women to get along, we harbour the rosy ideal that we are all understanding and honest and prefer each other’s company to that of men? Do we really believe that if the world was populated by women alone everything would be better?

I’m a woman hating feminist at heart I guess.

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